I'm tired.
I'm tired of the whole useless circle again and again. I'm really growing tired with online gaming in many ways. There's still some reasons why I like to stay, but my patience is growing thin. Above all, it is the feeling of uselessness. I come home, full of ideas and energy, and having to spend time with a pathetic bunch of status-seeking idiots to get out a few golden moments seem like such a waste. With that said, I've had some great, great times through online gaming and met some wonderful people, Melanie especially.
It's just the rest of it - the smallness of the people. Perhaps it's just my own problem with people that's talking, but I get fed up by their quasi-knowledge, ass-licking and politicking. And the sheer stupidity of some things, too.
I'm slowly getting over City of Shadows where I used to ST. I'm not ready to ST again online for quite a bit, and maybe I never want to again. All I really want to do is enjoy myself, meet people and roleplay. I'm sick of people chitchatting about totally meaningless things while anything really important either seems intimidating, is way above them, is way beyond them or is hushed down because of how "sensitive" it is.
Idiotic.
Too much politics, too many idiots, too much nonsense, too much waste.
Otherwise I am doing a lot of thinking. Reading a biography of Marx. Trying to work as much with my mind as possible. If there is ever any chance of me getting anywhere, I am going to need every little ounce of knowledge I can scrape up. And it does make me happy. Conversing with like-minded, goofing out, reading some really important things. Lund, where my university is, is more than a thousand years old. Large parts of it still feel medieval. The entire place breathes history, but at the same time there is a great sense of force and creativity. I love it there.
Melanie is coming the 17th! That's the best part of this gloomy post. I'm so excited, and so happy that she's coming here finally. I'm so excited!! It'll be so great to have her here over christmas, go see Copenhagen and Stockholm... wander down the old streets of Lund and Malmö. Pointing out things here, celebrating Christmas in a Swedish way, watching movies, roleplaying... I really just want to hold her in my arms. And that right now, preferably.
It's just the rest of it - the smallness of the people. Perhaps it's just my own problem with people that's talking, but I get fed up by their quasi-knowledge, ass-licking and politicking. And the sheer stupidity of some things, too.
I'm slowly getting over City of Shadows where I used to ST. I'm not ready to ST again online for quite a bit, and maybe I never want to again. All I really want to do is enjoy myself, meet people and roleplay. I'm sick of people chitchatting about totally meaningless things while anything really important either seems intimidating, is way above them, is way beyond them or is hushed down because of how "sensitive" it is.
Idiotic.
Too much politics, too many idiots, too much nonsense, too much waste.
Otherwise I am doing a lot of thinking. Reading a biography of Marx. Trying to work as much with my mind as possible. If there is ever any chance of me getting anywhere, I am going to need every little ounce of knowledge I can scrape up. And it does make me happy. Conversing with like-minded, goofing out, reading some really important things. Lund, where my university is, is more than a thousand years old. Large parts of it still feel medieval. The entire place breathes history, but at the same time there is a great sense of force and creativity. I love it there.
Melanie is coming the 17th! That's the best part of this gloomy post. I'm so excited, and so happy that she's coming here finally. I'm so excited!! It'll be so great to have her here over christmas, go see Copenhagen and Stockholm... wander down the old streets of Lund and Malmö. Pointing out things here, celebrating Christmas in a Swedish way, watching movies, roleplaying... I really just want to hold her in my arms. And that right now, preferably.
posted by Björn at 8:56 PM
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